fast update

In one of my last posts, I announced that I was auditioning for Kiss Me Kate at Cain Park. Sadly, I got my rejection letter, but whatever. Their loss. I will say that I was up against some Pimpercrombie and Bitch cookie cutter children, and I'm sure they could sing to boot. I'm happy to say that I got in touch with my first college choir director from good ol' Tri-High, and I'll be taking voice lessons from her this summer. Sweeeeeeet.

Work has stunk lately, and there's far too much for me to actually put down in the short time I have to type today. Since, that is, afterall, where I'm at. But, I will say that the "raise" I got last week was far from what I was expecting, and I had a polite and politically correct chat with my boss about it. I should have an opportunity to go over my performance review sometime this week. (Yeah, I know, how bogus that I got my raise without having ever seen my review!)

For those of you watching my love life with curiosity, things with Matt are great. Still feels weird sometimes to be dating after such a long friendship, but nice all the same.

Ok, back to the grindstone. Hope all are well!

I See Dead People

After reading Bryan's post about his NYC dream, I felt the need to post about my own wacky brain test patterns. I have very vivid dreams. I'll go through spurts where I won't remember any of my dreams, and bursts where I have dreams that seem to last all night long, that I can recall in amazing detail. I have had an odd experience with deceased family members in my messed up dreams. You'll probably find my descriptions creepy, so Bre, you won't want to read any further. But it fascinates the hell out of me.
After each of my grandparents passed away (I have 1 who is still alive), I've had a series of 3 dreams about them. Mom's mom died when I was about 8, so those dreams were simple compared to the latter ones. All three of the dreams had to do with Grandma Owen leaping out of the casket and chasing me around the church, while my family screamed and ran in the other direction, leaving me to fend for myself. Grandma Brown (Dad's mom) died when I was 12. I don't remember all 3 dreams; just the strangest of them all. I was in Junior High at the time, backstage at the high school. I was in a concert, and was backstage waiting to go on for my solo. The stage manager came back (which is odd, because that was before I even knew what a stage manager was; he was in his mid 40's, balding, beer belly, wearing a headset) and told me that my Grandma was there to see me. "Impossible," I said,"both of my grandmothers' are dead." "Well, I dunno kid, some woman is here, and says she's your grandma. She's coming backstage to talk to you." So I freaked out, and looked down the hallway that goes back to the choir room, and there was Grandma Brown, hurrying down the hallway to see me. I sat myself down on a stool, plugged my ears with my fingers, and slammed my eyes shut. The only thing I managed to hear her say was "Becki, there's something very important I have to tell you." She kept talking, but I was sitting on the stool, humming to block out the sound of her voice. I'm 24 now, and still wonder what she said in my dream.
The 3 CREEPIEST dreams I've had have been about my Grandpa Brown, who died when I was 21. I can now only recall 2 of the dreams, but still very vividly. In my second dream, the whole family was sitting down to a holiday dinner, when all of a sudden, Grandpa comes floating through the door. He didn't have legs; where his legs should have been, he just tapered off, like a ghost. I'm the only one in the family who is completely freaked out by his appearance at our table. Dad is scurrying to get him a chair, telling him "Dad, we thought you were dead, I'm so happy to see you!!!!!" Without speaking, Grandpa made it clear that he was angered because he didn't receive an invitation to dinner (Grandpa always felt he had to be invited to dinner, he refused to "assume" he was wanted at all the major family functions.) "Dad, you were dead, that's why we didn't call to invite you," my Dad appologized. As my father hurried to make him a dinner plate, the rest of the family appeared happy and excited by the appearance of our ghostly visitor. I sat at the head of the table stifling screams of terror. Finally, Dad set a plate of food in front of my grandfather. As Dad resumed his seat, Grandpa beckoned to my brother to pass him the pitcher of iced tea in front of him. Robert passed it, and as Grandpa set it in front of him, he suddenly lost all animation, and fell dead in to the pitcher. I woke up too terrified to go back to sleep.
The third dream, I was at a dance, like a cottilion. Dressed up like some southern belle, I mingled, danced, drank punch, and had a lovely time. All of a sudden, Mom, Dad, and Robert (my brother) came bursting into the dance hall, and rushed up to me. "Becki, Becki, Grandpa's looking for you," Mom said in a rushed and breathless voice. Almost laughing, I replied incredulously, "That's impossible, Grandpa's dead." "I know, that's what makes it so strange!!!" Mom shouted. "We just came to warn you, because we didn't want you to freak out if he showed up," Robert said. And they turned and left. I sat down in a nearby chair to collect my thoughts. When I looked next to me, there sat Grandpa, silently gazing at me. He sat, right leg crossed over his left, like he always did, left arm across his chest, right hand up by his mouth. Just looking at me, with his brilliant blue eyes. But this time, I didn't freak out and race away, screaming bloody murder. I just looked back at him and said, "you wouldn't do anything to scare me, would you?" And again, he didn't say a word, but I was made to understand that he wouldn't frighten me. He just sat, looking at me for a few moments, and then I awoke, missing him.