Everything
Hi again.
It's been an insane few weeks. You all know that Matt's Dad passed away on June 21. It's been a hard few weeks. Not that anyone expected it to be easy. But for those of you who have known me since college, you know that when it comes to death and dying, I'm a wreck. My sorority sisters have seen more funerals for parents then we'd like, and they know that I become a complete disaster. I will, however, say that I managed a stiff upper lip most of the time for Matt. He had enough on his plate doing the dutiful son thing without having to feel like he had to be there for me. My whole goal was just to be there for him. Mostly, I fell apart when my parents came in. And for a few moments at the chapel service at the funeral home, and the funeral itself. But I accomplished my goal; I was there for him.
Work has been ok when Kim hasn't tried to make a new home for herself up my ass. 36 days until my vacation!!!
Christina (my little little sorority sister) started a job a few weeks ago with the mental health center I used to work for. For my old boss, and more than likely, with alot of my old clients. I'm really excited for her.
The wedding plans for my brother are moving along. I've been asked to sing for the ceremony, specifically the lighting of the unity candle, but they don't seem excited about the idea. I mean, not that my brother is ever excited about anything that doesn't have to do with his fantasy sports teams, the Republican party, or money, but you'd think he'd care a little about the music for his wedding. I'm starting to think that asking me to sing was Lisa's idea, and that she didn't run it by him before she came to me with it. Whatever. My bridesmaid dress is in; hope it fits and I don't have to get a bunch of alterations.
I took my Dad to an Indian's game last week for his birthday. They played horribly, but we had a great time. It was nice; I've wanted to do something like that with my Dad for a long time, but haven't had the opportunity before now. I'll probably make it at least a yearly thing.
All is well, for the most part. I mentioned in my last post that Matt and I had hit a rough patch, but that has gotten better. We still have some things to work out, but that's life. That's what relationships are. I'll get sappy for a minute. I love him. He's a good man. The past several weeks have brought that into more immediate relief. He took me out to Fox and Hound a week or two ago. He might have bought me dinner, but I paid his bar tab, and bought him a cigar. We talk alot about traditional male/female roles in relationships. Last night, I made dinner and ran his dishwasher as he worked on his online class. He observed that he thought that women took on this traditional role because men take one more stressful jobs for the better pay; women tend to take on less stressful jobs because their emotional health is more valuable to them than a higher paycheck. He thought I was taking on a "traditional role" by making him dinner and washing his dishes to make him happy because he was stressed out. I told him the fact it made him happy was merely a side benefit. I was doing it because he was stressed out and busy, and cooking and cleaning for him was a way of caring for him. Same thing with the booze and cigar. He grieves like I do; with a moderate amount of alcohol. He isn't comfortable doing that in front of his Mom and sister, so it was my way of taking care of him.
I may not be cut out for my Grandmother's apron, but I do find some unorthodox ways of falling into a traditionally female role.
It's been an insane few weeks. You all know that Matt's Dad passed away on June 21. It's been a hard few weeks. Not that anyone expected it to be easy. But for those of you who have known me since college, you know that when it comes to death and dying, I'm a wreck. My sorority sisters have seen more funerals for parents then we'd like, and they know that I become a complete disaster. I will, however, say that I managed a stiff upper lip most of the time for Matt. He had enough on his plate doing the dutiful son thing without having to feel like he had to be there for me. My whole goal was just to be there for him. Mostly, I fell apart when my parents came in. And for a few moments at the chapel service at the funeral home, and the funeral itself. But I accomplished my goal; I was there for him.
Work has been ok when Kim hasn't tried to make a new home for herself up my ass. 36 days until my vacation!!!
Christina (my little little sorority sister) started a job a few weeks ago with the mental health center I used to work for. For my old boss, and more than likely, with alot of my old clients. I'm really excited for her.
The wedding plans for my brother are moving along. I've been asked to sing for the ceremony, specifically the lighting of the unity candle, but they don't seem excited about the idea. I mean, not that my brother is ever excited about anything that doesn't have to do with his fantasy sports teams, the Republican party, or money, but you'd think he'd care a little about the music for his wedding. I'm starting to think that asking me to sing was Lisa's idea, and that she didn't run it by him before she came to me with it. Whatever. My bridesmaid dress is in; hope it fits and I don't have to get a bunch of alterations.
I took my Dad to an Indian's game last week for his birthday. They played horribly, but we had a great time. It was nice; I've wanted to do something like that with my Dad for a long time, but haven't had the opportunity before now. I'll probably make it at least a yearly thing.
All is well, for the most part. I mentioned in my last post that Matt and I had hit a rough patch, but that has gotten better. We still have some things to work out, but that's life. That's what relationships are. I'll get sappy for a minute. I love him. He's a good man. The past several weeks have brought that into more immediate relief. He took me out to Fox and Hound a week or two ago. He might have bought me dinner, but I paid his bar tab, and bought him a cigar. We talk alot about traditional male/female roles in relationships. Last night, I made dinner and ran his dishwasher as he worked on his online class. He observed that he thought that women took on this traditional role because men take one more stressful jobs for the better pay; women tend to take on less stressful jobs because their emotional health is more valuable to them than a higher paycheck. He thought I was taking on a "traditional role" by making him dinner and washing his dishes to make him happy because he was stressed out. I told him the fact it made him happy was merely a side benefit. I was doing it because he was stressed out and busy, and cooking and cleaning for him was a way of caring for him. Same thing with the booze and cigar. He grieves like I do; with a moderate amount of alcohol. He isn't comfortable doing that in front of his Mom and sister, so it was my way of taking care of him.
I may not be cut out for my Grandmother's apron, but I do find some unorthodox ways of falling into a traditionally female role.
posted by Becki | 10:08 AM
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